Positions

Reverse Lotus

The Reverse Lotus is a sexual position derived from the classic Lotus (also called the Yab-Yum) position. In the standard Lotus, one partner sits cross-legged while the other faces them, straddling their lap and wrapping their legs around their partner's back. In the Reverse Lotus, the straddling partner faces away from the seated partner instead of toward them, creating rear-facing penetration or genital contact while maintaining the close, seated, wrapped configuration. Both partners remain in an upright seated orientation, with the rear-facing partner able to lean back against their partner's chest or lean forward for a different angle and depth. The position works for penetrative sex as well as non-penetrative grinding and stimulation. It combines elements of spooning intimacy with a cowgirl or reverse-cowgirl dynamic, all while keeping both partners seated and closely physically connected. It is popular among couples who want deep physical closeness, the ability to touch each other's bodies freely, and a position that allows the rear-facing partner significant control over rhythm and depth.

What it's like

In practice, the Reverse Lotus begins with one partner sitting cross-legged on a bed, floor, or firm surface. The other partner then sits in their lap facing away, and depending on flexibility, may wrap their legs around or alongside their partner's. From there, both partners can settle into a comfortable, connected posture before initiating any movement or stimulation.

The rear-facing partner has a high degree of control. They can lean back onto their partner's chest, which brings their bodies into full contact from behind and allows the base partner to reach around easily. Leaning forward shifts weight, changes the penetrative angle, and gives the rear-facing partner more leverage to set their own rhythm.

What draws people to this position is typically the combination of physical closeness and autonomy. It retains the chest-to-back body contact of spooning, the rear-facing dynamic of reverse cowgirl, and the enveloping quality of the classic Lotus all at once. Hands are free for additional stimulation. Eye contact is not available in this configuration, which some people find freeing and others find less ideal.

Common variations include the rear-facing partner keeping legs extended forward rather than crossed, and using pillows under the seated partner's knees or hips to adjust the overall angle and comfort level.

Safety & consent

Hip flexor strain and knee discomfort are common concerns, particularly for the seated partner holding a cross-legged position for extended periods. Use cushions or a firm surface to reduce joint stress. The rear-facing partner controls angle and depth, so communication about comfort is essential before and during. Penetrative use of this position can put unusual lateral stress on the penetrating partner's anatomy, so check in frequently. Agree on a clear signal or safeword to pause if anything is uncomfortable. Warm up with some light stretching beforehand if either partner has limited hip flexibility.

Common misconceptions

Getting started safely

  1. Choose a firm, supportive surface like a bed with a solid mattress or a carpeted floor. Very soft surfaces make it harder for the seated partner to maintain a stable position.
  2. Place a folded blanket or firm pillow under the seated partner's knees and tailbone before starting. This reduces joint strain and extends the amount of time the position is comfortable.
  3. Do a dry run without penetration or stimulation first, just getting into the shape of the position together, so you can troubleshoot comfort and alignment before things get heated.
  4. Establish a quick verbal or physical check-in signal before you begin, since eye contact is not available in this position and reading facial expressions is harder.
  5. Start with shorter sessions and experiment with the rear-facing partner leaning back versus forward to find the angle and depth that works best for both of you.

Frequently asked questions

What is the difference between the Lotus and the Reverse Lotus position?

In the classic Lotus (Yab-Yum), the straddling partner faces their seated partner directly, allowing eye contact and chest-to-chest contact. In the Reverse Lotus, the straddling partner faces away, which shifts the dynamic to a rear-facing, back-to-chest configuration and changes the angle of any penetration or contact.

Is the Reverse Lotus good for plus-size or less flexible people?

Yes, with modifications. Using firm cushions under the seated partner's hips and knees reduces strain significantly. The rear-facing partner can also keep their legs extended forward rather than crossed, which demands much less hip flexibility.

Who controls the movement in the Reverse Lotus?

The rear-facing partner typically drives the rhythm since they can push off the floor or bed and shift their weight forward or backward. The seated partner can use their hands on the other's hips to assist, but direct thrusting is more limited in this position.

Can this position work for same-sex couples or non-penetrative play?

Absolutely. The Reverse Lotus is fully accessible for non-penetrative use, including grinding, mutual stimulation, and intimacy with toy use. The free-hands dynamic of the position makes it especially adaptable for couples of any gender or anatomy.

What are the most common complaints people have about this position?

The most frequently cited issues are knee and hip discomfort for the seated partner after a few minutes, and difficulty maintaining the angle for penetration without readjusting. Padding the surface and communicating about comfort as you go addresses most of these concerns.

How does intimacy in the Reverse Lotus compare to other positions?

Because full back-to-chest contact is possible, many people describe it as physically warmer and more enveloping than cowgirl variants. However, it lacks face-to-face visibility, so couples who prioritize eye contact may want to pair it with other positions during a session.

How to bring it up

  1. Prompt 1"I've been curious about trying a reverse lotus position. It's basically like reverse cowgirl but we're both seated and really close together. Would you want to explore that?"
  2. Prompt 2"Would you ever want to try a seated position where I face away from you but we're still wrapped up together? I think it could feel really intimate."
  3. Prompt 3"I've been reading about different intimate positions and the reverse lotus caught my eye. It looks like a cool mix of closeness and the rear-facing angle. Can we try it?"

Commonly rated together

Reverse CowgirlFace-sittingCowgirlWoman on Top69 / Mutual OralAmazonGrinding MissionaryLazy Dog

Reviewed by Reviewed by the Jar of Kinks editorial team