Feederism

Squashing

Squashing is a kink in which one person (the "squasher") uses their body weight to sit, lie, or press on top of another person (the "squashee"). The appeal typically centers on the size, weight, and physical presence of the squasher, and the experience of being pressed, covered, or pinned beneath them. Squashing is closely associated with feederism and size-related kinks, where larger body size is eroticized, but participation is not limited to any particular body type. The squashee may enjoy sensations of pressure, warmth, immobilization, or a feeling of being enveloped. The squasher may enjoy expressing dominance or physical presence. Squashing can range from gentle sitting or leaning to full-body pressing, depending on agreed-upon intensity. It is distinct from pure BDSM bondage in that the primary element is body weight rather than restraints, though the two are sometimes combined. Like all kinks, it is practiced consensually between adults and can be integrated into broader scenes involving size difference, domination, or feederism dynamics.

What it's like

In practice, squashing typically begins with the squasher positioning themselves on top of or against the squashee in an agreed-upon way. Common positions include the squasher sitting on the squashee's lap, thighs, or back, or lying fully on top of them. The squashee experiences varying levels of pressure, warmth, and physical restriction depending on position and the squasher's size relative to their own.

Many participants describe the appeal in terms of sensory intensity: the feeling of being held down, surrounded by another person's body, and unable to move freely. For the squashee, this can evoke feelings of safety, submission, or intense physical stimulation. For the squasher, there is often an element of expressed confidence in their size, physical dominance, or pleasure in being desired for their body.

Common variations include face-sitting (the squasher sits on the squashee's face or chest), full-body lying, and "partial squash" where only a portion of weight is applied. Squashing frequently overlaps with feederism because body size is central to the dynamic, but people of all sizes can participate in both roles. Some couples incorporate it into longer scenes involving verbal humiliation, worship, or role-play, while others engage with it as a standalone physical activity focused purely on pressure and closeness.

Safety & consent

Breathing safety is the top priority. The squashee must always be able to signal discomfort, so a non-verbal safe signal (such as tapping three times) is essential since verbal communication may be difficult. The squasher should never place full weight directly on the squashee's chest, throat, or face without careful positioning and constant check-ins. Start with partial weight and brief durations, gradually building only as both partners remain comfortable. People with respiratory conditions, back issues, or joint problems should approach with extra caution. Aftercare is important, as the intensity of physical pressure and power dynamics can produce strong emotional responses in both partners.

Common misconceptions

Getting started safely

  1. Establish a non-verbal safe signal before your first session, such as tapping the squasher three times, since speaking may be difficult under pressure.
  2. Start with the squasher using a wall or their own arms to support some of their weight rather than applying full body weight immediately, so the squashee can gauge their comfort level.
  3. Keep initial sessions short (one to two minutes of pressure at a time) and check in verbally between each attempt to discuss what felt good and what did not.
  4. Agree in advance on which body parts can receive weight (thighs, back, lap) and which are off-limits (full chest, throat, face) until both partners have more experience together.
  5. Discuss aftercare needs beforehand, as the physical intensity and power dynamic can leave both partners needing reassurance, physical warmth, or quiet time together afterward.

Frequently asked questions

Is squashing physically safe?

Squashing carries real physical risks, particularly around breathing and joint or muscle strain, but those risks can be meaningfully reduced with preparation. Using non-verbal safe signals, starting with partial weight, avoiding direct pressure on the chest or throat, and checking in frequently are the core safety measures. People with pre-existing respiratory or musculoskeletal conditions should be especially cautious and may want to consult a doctor.

Do both partners have to be into feederism to enjoy squashing?

No. While squashing appears in feederism contexts because body size is often central to the dynamic, the kink can be enjoyed purely for its physical sensations or power dynamics, independent of any interest in feeding or weight gain. Some people enjoy squashing simply for the feeling of pressure, warmth, or immobilization.

What is the difference between squashing and smothering?

Smothering typically refers specifically to using a body part (often the buttocks, thighs, or breasts) to cover the face and restrict breathing intentionally. Squashing is broader and refers to applying body weight across various parts of the body. Smothering can be one element within a squashing scene, but squashing does not require any restriction of breathing at all.

Can someone of average or smaller size be a squasher?

Yes. While the kink is often associated with larger body sizes, a person of any size can act as the squasher. The dynamics and sensations will differ based on the size relationship between partners, and some people specifically prefer a smaller size difference, while others prefer a larger one. Communication about what each partner finds appealing is more important than meeting a particular size threshold.

How do I tell my partner I'm interested in squashing without making it awkward?

Framing the conversation outside of a sexual moment tends to work well, such as during a relaxed conversation about interests or while discussing a kink list together. Being specific about what appeals to you (the pressure, the power dynamic, the closeness) helps your partner understand what you are actually looking for. Tools like shared kink inventories can also make it easier to surface mutual interests without one person feeling put on the spot.

Is squashing always dominant or submissive in nature?

Not necessarily. While many squashing dynamics do involve a power element (the squasher as dominant, the squashee as submissive), some couples engage with it in a more neutral or playful way without any explicit D/s framing. The kink can be about physical sensation, intimacy, or body appreciation just as much as it can be about power exchange. Partners define the dynamic themselves.

How to bring it up

  1. Prompt 1"I've been curious about squashing and the idea of feeling pinned under a partner's weight. Is that something you'd be open to talking about?"
  2. Prompt 2"Would you ever want to try something where one of us sits or lies on the other? I find the pressure and weight aspect really appealing."
  3. Prompt 3"I've been reading about size-based kinks and squashing came up. I'm interested in exploring it. Can we talk about what that might look like for us?"

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Reviewed by Reviewed by the Jar of Kinks editorial team